With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine.
A couple years ago my therapist told me I had problems letting go of the past.
Your as worthless as, Tits on a boar hog.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!
I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen.
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
Glad I'm not a general, because auto-correct just changed "lunch order" to "launch order."
Please, keep talking. I always yawn when I am interested.
If mummies are from egypt, then where are daddies from?
A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually.
The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why? "Cause you're fatter than they are."
Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
I took a course in speed waiting. Now I can wait an hour in only ten minutes.
I wondered why the Frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.
Brains are wonderful, I wish everyone had one.
I pretend to work as long as they pretend to pay me.
The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
I'm selling a parachute just as new, used only one time, didn't open once.
It ain't the jeans that make your butt look fat.